Poetry Life and Mind-ful Things

Archive for the ‘son’ Category

They’re All Miracles

Welcome to the Second Edition of the  Black Birth Carnival. Hosted by Darcel of The Mahogany Way Birth Cafe and Nicole of Musings From The Mind of Sista Midwife.
The Topic: Not Without Our Fathers. So often we talk birth in women circles. We celebrate birth within the feminine community and forget that without the fathers our birth experiences would be non existent. June 17th marks the day many will celebrate fathers in this country. With that in mind we came up with our topic for this installment of the Black Birth Blog Carnival.
This post you will be updated with live links by Noon, linking back to the other participants posts.


I don’t know what the stats are for men of color to be present when their children are born, but I for one wouldn’t trade that for anything. It is definitely life changing. 

I remember when TheWife was in labor at the hospital with Darcel. We didn’t know if we were having a boy or girl. I didn’t know if I was going into the delivery room or not. We didn’t attend any of those Lamaze classes (heck, I don’t know if they had them back then). So it’s time for her to go in and it wasn’t until then I was told to get myself ready. I’m in there nervous and ready. TheWife was in labor for hours so it wasn’t very long after, Darcel was born into this world. I was soooo happy and all smiles….I was so up there I knew then that as a man, that was the ultimate human experience. You see firsthand and robe yourself in as close a birth experience without giving birth, that you will have for the rest of your life. You see what the woman in your life goes through ….I can only imagine how home birth fathers can put into words their experiences.


Now Reg was a totally different experience. Apparently TheWife and her grandmother had made plans for the labor time at the hospital to be minimal…without telling me. I knew it was time for us to leave and couldn’t figure out what in the world they were waiting for. Her grandmother finally says it’s time to go. I’m driving like all get out but don’t take the freeway because it’s late with hardly any traffic. I keep checking on her to make sure everything is ok. We’re just about there and I could almost tell by the way she was positioning herself in the seat that things were getting or had already gotten to the point of, we really need to be at the hospital. I miss the turn into the parking lot, get it turned around and she says she’s not going to be able to go in so I run in and tell them my wife is having a baby and I remember a nurse getting a wheelchair and I told her it was beyond that. Before you know it my car is almost surrounded….next thing I know, Reg is born. I didn’t get to see his birth, (I was crowded out) but it was an experience I will never forget.

Experiencing child birth up close doesn’t stop with mine…I have had the pleasure to be there with two of My3Grands. Kiah was the first and Samuel was the third. Although I wasn’t there for Ava’s birth I still feel as if I was a part of it because TheWife and I were watching Kiah during Ava’s home birth. We got updates by phone from DaddyCharles. When we got the ok to come to there place, it still felt magical….like we were there the whole time.


I’m not sure if I captured the moments in words, what I had experienced with these five loving souls that are in my life. I don’t know if I am a different person versus not having the experience of child birth, but there is one thing I know for certain….the sounds of a woman struggling through the stages of labor, into giving birth….the sounds of a baby’s first cry, the sounds of joy expressed by all….can never be taken away….they are all miracles.



Please take the time to read and comment on the other participants posts. Shahmet at Adia Publishing: A Father Before Birth Reggie at WhatrUWorkinon?: They’re All Miracles Nicole at Musings From The Mind of Sista Midwife: #BlackBirth Not Without Our Fathers Darcel at The Mahogany Way Birth Cafe: Are Men at Birth Important? Alexis at The Ivy Expansion: A Fathers Love Mavhu at F.W. Hargrove: I Birth At Home Twitter Hashtag #BlackBirth

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I Have Sons Too

There have been so many events that have taken our breath way over time…far too many. And this latest concerning the death of young Trayvon Martin is beyond shocking to put it politely. 


When I saw the first picture of Trayvon, my first thought was how young he looked for his age and second how small his body frame was. A few hours ago, Trayvon’s parents were being interviewed on TV…sorry don’t remember with who…and his father described what the police told him…after showing him a picture of his dead son…concerning the events that lead to the death of his son.


He was told that after Zimmerman, the security guard who was told by the police not to follow the guy, met up with Trayvon and after a scuffle, Trayvon was “straddled over Zimmerman with his hand over Zimmerman’s mouth“. Then Zimmerman was able to draw his weapon and fire one shot…”Trayvon put his hands in the air and said ‘you got me’ “, and fell back…dead or dying. Shot by someone who shouldn’t have been there.


What was it that made Zimmerman want to pursue after Trayvon when he as clearly told not to. Why didn’t that same instinct or whatever drove Zimmerman to the point of contact….upon that contact, without even knowing his true age, say to himself…even without gut instinct…say to himself….this is just a kid. Even if Trayvon had said something undesirable to Zimmerman….Trayvon looks like a kid and should have been handled accordingly. But apparently, Zimmerman never caught that.


It is a travesty when we are profiled/judged because of what we wear or how we look. Now I’ll be the first to tell you that I’m not big on the pants around the ankles and waddling like a duck when you walk, but I do know that what I see is not necessarily the person. I like to wear a hoodie but don’t usually wear the hood unless I’m shielding myself from the cold. 


Why am I all of a sudden on a tandem about anything? I have had changes in the past couple of months and just these past few weeks have been even more changes….then this happens….it struck a nerve. It happened at a time when I can no longer be silent.  


There was a moment in time, when someone didn’t listen, and a young Trayvon Martin was shot and died. 


I have sons too… 

  

First Beach Day 2011

Yesterday was my first day at the beach this year and it was a mixture for me even though I had a good time overall. 

Everyone had the day off except Charles…mine didn’t seem like a day off altogether, but that’s all I’m gonna say about that

It started out to be a cloudy day but slowly began to clear somewhat, becoming cloudy to partly cloudy. I heard that it rained at the oceanfront pretty heavy in the morning.


We didn’t see any rain at all even with the clouds. It was warm when we arrived and breezy! We had umbrellas and had to put them down not long after we set up.

The girls didn’t waste any time getting into the water…I cautiously stepped in and couldn’t believe how chilly it was as I watched them play.


Of course there was time for just chillin.

As I said before, it was cloudy all day. Darcel and I had noticed how this cloud looked as if it was reaching for this ship.

ooohhh nooo!!! it looks like that cloud is trying to get me!

it’s a good thing i’m equipped with my new retro
burning fuel stacked packaged excel when needed
system….haahaahaaa!!!!

so long cloud…cain’t touch this!

I guess the ship was too fast for the cloud….hmmmm, maybe the cloud was water logged.

It did look as if it might rain later on and it cooled off quite a bit. Even the sand lost its warmth. 

That’s about the time I began to lose interest, but we stayed and the clouds broke up releasing the sun’s warming rays.

Me and TheWife went to Wal Mart yesterday morning to pick up a few things and a grill was one them. Nothing fancy…plain new charcoal burning grill.
As I grilled, I also started this post. This is my new toy…again, nothing fancy. This is my new Dell Inspiron mini. It’s perfect for what I need right now and I can expand so to speak if necessary. I connected my Logitech wireless mouse with ease. If I ever want to work from a larger screen, no problem…I can connect my 21 inch flat panel effortlessly. It’s a good thing I got it when I did. After the storm we had the other day and no electric for a day, my pc won’t even turn on. I have a lot of files I need to retrieve from that hd.

Oh yes…I’m still #workinon my meme which will be starting shortly!! I’m excited about it and hope you will join me when it is launched.

The do’s and don’ts will be coming soon along with how to link in for those who have never done it before.

That’s all I have for now…Whatr U Workin On?

#whatruworkinon 

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