I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about many different things. Some of it making me very angry, some making me think even more, some giving me feelings of despair, and some giving me answers.
Archive for the ‘thoughts’ Category
A fire travels above the cool quench below in sight
Poem by me
I finally got around to making it comfortable to work outside. The shade and the breeze are soothing. TheWife was off Wednesday and ‘reminded me’ that it would be a good idea to put the umbrella up. We have a dining room table that’s been around since we’ve been married….well after we got our first apartment…..anyway, I digress ; the only thing I had to do was to drill the hole and set the umbrella. We had chairs but the table is the only thing that survived, but these will do for now.
Now I’m outside and I realized my thoughts spanned several years of my life. A couple of days ago I was thinking of “the thought that kept driving me to do better than where I am” at any given moment in my life, that is what I want to do. Strive to do better, even when others see it as just someone else with a dream. The driving force in this particular thought stems from my tenure as an Autoglass Technician. When I first got into installing, it was a new adventure…learning, hands on, making decisions, getting things done under, at times almost impossible circumstances. Sure there were lots of times when a call was necessary but for the most part it was if I was my own company.
So over the years I made manager and this was a whole new ballgame. I felt as if I was fed to the wolves. I was a ‘working manager’ and many aspects of the job were never taught…yeah you know, on the managing end. Of course I was to ‘pick up on this part’ in between installs. It was almost a torturous number of years. So when that didn’t work, I was offered a tech job….that’s pretty much what they all do when you don’t work out as a manager….unless you really screwed up bad.
Besides my drive to want a better life for myself and my family, I scoped the ranks of the technician pool and I didn’t want to be one of those who has toiled and labored for years on end and then retire as a tech. I saw the battered bodies and frustrated minds….but I kept listening to the promise of opportunity…even with another company….and there too, the years of labor taking its toll on the seniors of the tech pool….realizing, if I stayed the course, I would be one of them.
I’m no better than any of them, but I finally chose to pull myself away from that table, and let the plate fall to its breaking….while I still have the drive and desire to fulfill accomplishments.
Now I turn my attention to other tables to see what feasts or spoils await.
The last thing I said in yesterday’s post was, what to do…what to do. I guess never giving up is one thing. When I got home from work, TheWife and I talked. It had nothing to do with what I have been posting about but it was talk that made me feel as if there is hope.
That’s the amazing thing about life….you never know what to expect at times. There were no fireworks, flashing lights or anything like that. It was as simple as can be, but it was genuine. I soaked it up like a sponge. I’m not saying that this is the beginning of what I have been hoping for….what I am saying is there was something in the air…it felt good.
What we did talk about had a lot to do with the future. We watched TV had some laughs and talked a bit more in between.
It’s not much, but….It’s A Start.