There was a time when moments were good
A time I thought I understood
Funny I never heard the words as I look back
I just knew you and I were on track
I don’t know what happened along the way
Was it something I said that made you stray?
I am disheartened to say the least
How you turned into such a beast
Your bitterness like a knife run through
We were one, but now we are two
The monster deep within you surfaced
The love I once knew was now misplaced
You took my love in more than one piece
As my beating heart did all but cease
You took this man and made it a shell
Empty and void without voice to tell
Of the bitterness bestowed to me
Warranted not from what I see
My love for you was tried and true
Count the ways, All I Did Was Love You
As I get older, the years definitely come and go faster and faster. I’m going back almost two years with the image in this post. The one above was created February 10th of the year indicated in the design. I have used the MyQuesMark design in so many ways the length of this post would scroll almost forever if I were to include them.
As I read this particular design, it hit me pretty hard because I know that I allowed some things to distract me and take me out of my game plan. Towards the end of this year 2013, my emotions were at the innermost depths of frustration fed despair. I do know that all is not lost…that light shines even in the darkest moments.
I’m ready for the new year and what awaits.
No matter how positive you try to be, bad things happen….I choose to acknowledge that. Some see that as having a negative attitude….I see it as reality. There is strength in failure and mistakes, falling down. The weakness is staying down.
I’m battered and bruised…and I wear my scars proudly. God won’t put anything before me that I cannot handle. He never said that some things won’t hurt or bring me to my knees….maybe that what He wants….me on my knees.
While I was away from posting and moving, I found that my blog here was offline due to a domain issue (not with WordPress). I was sure my domain was good well into 2014 but for some reason I was shut down. I am now back up and running but I still have to look into what happened because now, even though very minimal, money is involved and I don’t think I should be out any at this time. But it’s not a big issue for me and I will find out what happened.
For now I am focused on returning to the task at hand, and that is posting and designing. Right now I am making sure my social media are all up to date before I dive into posting. With moving, and Christmas approaching, working a few more hours than I was a year ago this time I haven’t managed my time the way I would like. The extra hours at work are a blessing, especially this time of year. A year ago I was barely getting 20 hours a week.
My art software has been quiet but my mind has been going at full speed. I’m not sure what to do with my Etsy store. With my website Mind-ful Things, I don’t see the need to keep my Etsy store especially when I sell everything at my Mind-ful Things site. I thought about dropping some things from my site and keeping them on Etsy but that means maintaining three sites which would include MindfulThings2, which I have integrated with the main site. I would also have to pay to list on Etsy (not linking to Etsy because my listings have expired). I’ll be working on these issues and will come to a decision soon.
Well that’s all I have for now. I was looking for a photo to drop into this post and came across this one….
Taken in 2011
Do I still look like this?
My most recent days have been focused on things around me. My mind is being filled with the events of the days in appreciation for what has become a part of my life in some ways. That covers such a wide span of categories I now I can’t cover them all right now.
I have been taking pictures of clouds hanging above us. Looking at them and noticing they are as close as the wave of my hands above my head. The different layers of what looks like cotton balls or stretched pillow stuffing across the sky. At the same time I realize what it would take for me to be in the same area as these pieces of nature make their way through this space in time.
The trees that block our view from things we want to capture in memories, photo albums of the mind. Those same trees giving us shade, shielding us from the heat of the sun that hangs in the heavens, providing more than just light and heat…giving the sustenance for our lives.
Noticing things we take for granted as simple as a light pole…that seems such a part of our surroundings, we don’t even see them anymore…as significant as they are.
So much has become of our world that simple things are insignificant anymore. The many doors that blot our journey, contain changes in our lives. Many doors will go unopened…waiting to reveal a shading tree, cotton masses in the sky, a star that is placed at the perfect spot for this planet to thrive. Just a moment….a space in time….for the days of the mind.
I had mentioned recently that I am in the process of making changes and moving forward in a direction that I feel will work for me. I find it necessary to limit my blog posts to allow more time for what I need to concentrate on. During this time, I’m asking that you please don’t leave and think that I have abandoned my blog. I do appreciate the likes and comments that shows your interest in what I have to say or design.
The steps ahead will have twists and turns, pulling me here and there.
2010 – 2013
There may be moments when the unknown will strike an element of fear.
2010 – 2013
But it will all lead me to where I would like to be.
Then I can breathe a sigh of relief.
I’m sure I will have a post here and there and some updates on my progress without giving away too much info. I will also keep an eye on what all of you are up to. With that said…I gotta go…lots of work ahead.
Sometimes when I’m sitting here at my work station, I wonder if what I am doing is really worth it. I spend hours upon hours designing, making changes and then when I think I’m happy with the finished product, more changes are made. There are times when I wander to check mail or just to browse, resting on a spot or two in envy when I read how luck shines on someone and they have an opportunity to make it big.
I would like to be successful in my work but I get discouraged and I feel as if all of this is such a waste of time. It’s been about two years since I’ve filed for my copyright and received the document in the mail last year. I was so excited to see it and was encouraged to continue on. As time rolled on, disappointment settled in once again. This is not unusual I’m sure….to be on this roller coaster ride because success does not come without up and downs.
Will I be as successful as I dream to be? Will all of my hard work pay off in the end? If I stay the course, only time will tell. Besides, in the end who has the right to say if success has truly laid a path for me….even if my name is not in the lights?
Is it really worth it?…..you betcha!